Author: fifteenkey (Page 91 of 95)
An old friend liked to use the cliché, “it’s the journey, not the destination.”
It is in that spirit that Kyle and I set out for a day-trip to Martha’s Vineyard for “JawsFest,” the 30th’anniversary celebration of the filming on the island. Really, I’m taking the one hour and forty-five minute drive to New Bedford and the one-hour ferry trip for one reason: to get a picture of Kyle with the big movie star. Yep, “Bruce,” as director Stephen Spielberg named him, is terrorizing the island once again!
We’ll arrive in Vineyard Haven around 11:00 and find our way to Heather Gardens in West Tisbury. Why a mechanical shark will be on display at an inland nursery and garden center is a mystery, but I’m going to relish it. Work it isn’t. The big mystery is whether Kyle will get close enough to the fictional great-white to snap a picture. He loves the crocodile from the Peter Pan films, but won’t go near the mechanical one at the Rainforest Café in Burlington… Stay tuned.
A friend of mine has cancer again. I think this is the 4th time. You would think this wretched disease would have learned it’s lesson by now, but no, it’s looking for another good old-fashioned ass-kicking. This cancer is “Wiley-Coyote” stupid. You know, keep trying over and over, but always ending up with an anvil smashed off your head. This is gonna be bad. I mean a really bad beating like those Richard Pryor used to describe in his stand-up act. Yeah, he’d tell about the “whoopin’s” he’d get from his mom when he did something really bad. He’d go on to describe in hilarious detail how she would lecture him and that the cadence of each word would be accompanied by a good, solid whack…. Same thing here… I can hear it now: “Didn’t…. I….. Tell…. Your…. Sorry…. Cancer… Ass…. Never…. To…. Come…. Back????” It’s gonna be “Rocky,” “Fight-Club,” and “The Thrilla in Manilla” all rolled into one with cancer lying dead in the ring when it’s over. I’m simply amazed that she comes into work, laughs, spits sarcastic humor and has incredibly loud conference calls all while kicking cancer’s ass. My favorite part is when she gets that Eastwood-esque glint in he Irish eyes, and says, “Do you feel lucky? Well, do ya… punk?” Cancer… Dude, give it up. You don’t want any of this.
Ted Sorensen was special counsel and a good friend to our 35th president, John F. Kennedy. On May 28th, he wrote an op-ed piece in the Boston Globe on what would have been JFK’s 88th birthday. Mr. Sorensen’s opinion speculates on what JFK might say to our leaders of today. I hope they read it. An excerpt:
To Vice President Dick Cheney on international organizations, alliances, and consultations: ”The United States is neither omnipotent nor omniscient. We are only 6 percent of the world’s population . . . we cannot impose our will upon the other 94 percent of mankind.” (University of Washington, 1961)
It turns out that an ex-FBI agent, Mark Felt, was the “Deep Throat” who guided Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein to “follow the money” as they investigated a ostensibly petty burglary at the Watergate complex outside Washington DC in June, 33 years ago. The two then young Washington Post reporters wrote a great book called “All the President’s Men” that later became an OK movie. Read the book, or if you’re lazy, rent the movie.
Match.com is really doing women on their site a disservice when they place this, um, eye-catching ad next to the 1” x ¾” pictures of “women seeking men.” I mean, there are some beautiful women on there, but man… Compared to air-brushed perfection? Unfair. I suppose it also pops up when women are checking out guys, so maybe the ladies are getting some shopping in and match.com is getting some click-through revenue. Actually, they got me to click through and look around, but I didn’t buy anything…today.
If many of the lonely souls are like me, then they take some time to write a “grabber” headline. So, I wonder what the thought process was for the women who came up with these:
Yet another dating service – That’s the spirit! You’ll be marrying your soulmate in no time!
RN seeks man with active brain waves – OK. Will an EKG be involved to verify?
Toss a football or wear a black dress – This is a good one, but it would have been so much better had she used “while wearing…”
*#^@^%#%@!!!!!!!!! – Maybe it’s just me, but there’s a “Bobbit-esque” vibe to this one.
Is there anyone NORMAL out there??!! – Um. No. Not really.
If married, drunk or liar do not reply – My favorite. A woman who knows what she doesn’t want.
Nudging Fate – Interesting. I think this is what most people are hoping an internet dating site will do for them. In fact, it would make a great name for a site…
“The greatest moments of the human spirit may be deduced from the greatest moments in music.” – Aaron Copland
The RustedRobot passed me a musical baton a few days ago. I will now do my part by picking it up off the stadium floor to keep the sonic relay going…
Total volume of music files on my computer: 5GB
The last CD I bought was: yesterday – “A sides win – singles 1992-2005” by Sloan
Song playing right now: “Still Be Around” by Uncle Tupelo (live)
Five songs I listen to a lot, or that mean a lot to me: These are in my 64M Nomad IIc that I use while working out, so I hear these at least 3 times a week:
1. “Whatshername” by Green Day
2. “Prove it All Night” (live in NYC) by Bruce Springsteen
3. “Rock Your Ass” by The Supersuckers
4. “Cold Hard Bitch” by Jet
5. “Ready for You” by Sloan (June 15th at TT The Bears – Cambridge)
I now elect to pass the baton to:
Megan, Barb, Dave and Mary
Leave yours in the comments field…
I think we can all agree not nearly enough is written about toothpaste. You know, think globally, act orally. I mean, imagine how much more unpleasant all those annoying friends, relatives, in-laws and especially close-talkers would be if not for Mentadent or Tom’s of Maine?
It amazes me how our senses can cause memory flashbacks to a time when we smelled, heard or tasted something memorable. For example, the smell of fresh pine in the Spring brings me back to an early game of catch, and hearing Grand Funk Railroad’s “We’re an American Band” conjures up images of my lifelong friend Mike Gonnella dancing at a party one night Sophomore year in High School in nothing but his whitey-tighties, but I’m swerving somewhere we don’t want to go. Let’s get back between the white lines.
Last week I bought a new Crest flavor called “Citrus Splash.” The consumer product marketeers have absolutely nailed me with this orange thing. I have Citrus Listerine, Ultra Palmolive with Orange Extracts and even Orange Pledgewipes. I don’t drink orange juice anymore though. Too many useless carbs. Anyway, as soon as the Crest Citrus splashed onto my tastebuds, I was sent reeling into a Time Tunnel visit back to high school when people drank Tang because supposedly Gemini astronauts did and every bad drinking story usually went like this:
Hero #1: “Did you hear that freak Johnson puked his guts out at the Youth Center?”
Hero #2: (Laughing) “Too many beers?”
Hero #1: “Tango. All over the juke-box.”
Hero #2: “Mah-Don” (Hero #2 was Italian) “Tango… No wonder.”
Freak: (Off in the distance yelling) “F&^%ing heroes s%ck!!!”
Hero #1: “Loser.”
Hero #2: “Pussy. I’ll kick his…”
Yeah, Tango was a cheap, pre-mixed screwdriver drink that tasted like Tang but was mostly alcohol. I don’t think they make the stuff anymore, but back when That 70’s Show was real, Tango could really ruin a Friday night (and most of a Saturday…). So, if you’re a late baby-boomer, try Crest Citrus Splash. It’ll take you back.
Many of us will enjoy a holiday day off on Monday specifically because of those who have died serving this country. Memorial Day originated as “Decoration Day” between 1866-68 to decorate the graves of our Civil War dead with flowers. The holiday was officially expanded in 1971 to honor all American war dead. Every American should do some reflecting on the meaning of this ultimate sacrifice made by so many.
I do think I understand the loss to some small extent, even though I’m fortunate to not have lost loved ones to war. While working for NEC around ten years ago in our DC office, I went our for a morning run. It was a crisp Easter Sunday. As I ran down New York Avenue to the Capitol Mall, the combination of cold air and warm rushing blood heightened my senses. I ran past the reflecting pool and up the stairs of the Lincoln Memoral to marvel at the size of a marbelized old Abe sitting in his chair. As I exited, I saw black and headed directly there.
The Vietnam Veterans Memorial Wall is made up of two black granite walls about 250 feet long that meet to form a “V.” Inscribed are the names of over 58,000 who died. The walls are sunk into the ground with the top level with the earth behind them. At the apex of the “V”, they are just over ten feet high, and they taper down to eight inches (20cm) at each end, so when I approached, the wall was underwhelming. I began my descent. As I walked down, my breathing was slowing toward the stillness of the place. I scanned the thousands of names, but I wasn’t moved. Then I saw a rose, just like this one.
There was a note with it. I haltingly stooped down, opened the note and read, “To my son. I love you and I miss you. Mom.” I felt an immediate and overwhelming rush of emotion and quickly resumed my run to get out of there. It wasn’t the enormity of over 58,000 names that got me, but the personal pain of one mother grieving the loss of her child.
Did you know that there is a National Moment of Remembrance at 3pm on Memorial Day? It asks Americans, wherever they are, to pause for one-minute in an act of national unity. It is intended to help reclaim Memorial Day as the sacred holiday it was meant to be. So, regardless of the politics of our wars, the dead didn’t make the policy. Give them a minute on Monday.
I just got IM’d by “kareemseun” and told I would get “a percentage” of $15 Million just for being me! (It’s about time I might add…) Anyway, I played with this cretin for about fifteen minutes then asked it how many people fall for the scam. Apparently, appealing to the greed and stupidity of Americans doesn’t just work in the stock market. Wired reports that an Aussie bilked quite a few dopes out of $3.8 million in 2004.
I receive a weekly (unless he’s slacking) newsletter called “Business Banter” by Tony Paradiso. Tony is smart and sarcastic, two qualities I hold dear. Here’s just a three ounce beer sampler of this weeks rant:
“Sadly, if we had begun serious research on alternative fuels during the 1974 oil embargo we’d probably have solved the problem by now. Unfortunately that would have taken real leadership from Washington. It would have also required an attention span longer than the life span of a tsetse fly from the American public. Neither of those existed then or now.”
If you’d like the free Business Banter, shoot an eMail to Tony. Also check out his weekly column in the Nashua Telegraph.
Tony ended this week with a humorous observation on the sexes submitted by one Leslie S:
“Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don’t want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take the apples from the ground that aren’t as good, but easy. The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they’re amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who’s brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.
Now men … men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it’s up to women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with!”
I do despise heights, but I love a good apple.