I can’t type a number representing the dead because it will immediately be obsolete. Inevitably most of us will lose a family member, loved one, friend, acquaintance… You get it. The ex·po·nen·tial growth “curve” of humans contracting the virus won’t bend downward until we remove humans from its path – either by isolation or death. Once you’ve taken your last breath, you can’t spread Covid. Better to “stay the fuck at home.” Huh. I wanted to link to the video of by Samuel L. Jackson, but instead see, “Video unavailable – This video contains content from Disney, who has blocked it on copyright grounds.” Priorities.
So how are you doing with this? I’ve been at a heightened state of paranoia since around March 10th when I began quarantine for my son and me. A couple of nights since, I’ve been certain I somehow caught it. One night my feet were cold in bed and I was convinced that represented fever, forthcoming lung shutdown, and death. Beyond our physical health and financial concerns, there are millions of us on the edge psychologically or headed there. Desperation may have many bad outcomes. As I peered into the bleak abyss of my imminent demise, I focused on my breath. Breath, Breath, Breath, Breath… asleep. Sorry, to be a reformed smoker guy, but have you tried meditating? It’s really helping me right now. Still, this is so surreal. I am paranoid. I let packages and mail sit for days before I touch them. This week, a good friend wrote, “Today I got a package from Yep Roc – 5 new albums. Wiped down the box then each album w bleach.”
What’s working for me… Well, work is insane for me right now. I’m interacting with our customers every day as they are seeking answers. We all are. Crazy work is a welcome distraction from thinking about death. Family Guy also distracts this sophomoric mind. Beth, Kyle and I watched “The Ten Commandments” last night. That was a fun 3:40 distraction, but the plague scene with the creeping dark fog entering homes was an unwelcome metaphor. Other than that, meditating, exercise and music help. Even this one.