Month: July 2008 (Page 1 of 2)

Well, Manny is in a Fed-Ex overnight box to Chavez Ravine, aka, the Island of Malcontent Sox. Four years ago to the day, No-More Garciaparra was shipped West after a classic, extra-inning Sox-Yanks game in the Bronx where Derek Jeter made a 12th inning grab of immortality while Nomie caught some pine. Ironically, Manny’s sit-in last Friday during a 1-0 loss to the Pinstripes was his last, uh, sit with the Sox.

In 2004, the Sox went on to win it all and it remains to be seen if ridding the ballclub of the “Manny being Manny” malaise will yield another World Championship. For sure, a distracted Sox have been awful lately and Manny has been the side show freak.

Thanks for the memories.

The Pats are in camp this week and it’s the first time since the big game copyrighted by the en eff el I’ve thought about how 18-0 became a joke. Streaks are destined to end, but some, like the consecutive scoreless run I’m on sure seem to keep themselves alive. Speaking of a long-ass streak, my baby brother has never beaten me on the golf course. Ever. Yeah, there was that time he hung with me through 18 while he had a testicle ascended into his left lung, but still, an “L” is an “L” whether you’ve got one nut or three. Lance Armstrong won 7 consecutive Tour de France, but enough about the one shy of a pair thing.

Even swinging with both boys descended, Corey has been unable to prevail. Sunday’s contest at Templeton’s Templewood Test Track was no exception. Lil’ Bro had a four stroke lead after two, but was down one after 4 in a furious contest of wild inconsistency. As we puffed “Acid” spice infused cigars, the match turned on the par 3 7th when I skulled an 8 iron just enough to cruise it on a line over an 80 yard pond, hop the bank and roll, pin high onto the green. Yep. Dumb luck. The par gave me a two stroke lead I didn’t give back. The truth is, if Corey could putt, he’d win a lot, but he can’t, so he doesn’t.

A couple ugly incidents marred the afternoon’s stroke fest, including a vain breach of the gentleman’s game etiquette by yours truly… Templewood’s Number 6 is a wide, downhill 405 par 4. After holding back all day to minimize my slice, I announced, “Boys, I’m lettin’ her rip.” Some commentary about the woods ensued, but I silenced the critics with a booming drive that sliced less than usual and landed 55 yards beyond Corey’s 200 yarder. Here’s where things went, um, downhill. During a Dad backswing, loud talking by an unruly gallery member (Kyle), prompted a large clump of turf, a 20 yard dribbler, and a piercing scowl from the Senior Circuit member. We called it a grandson mulligan and let “Papa” replay shot # 2 with the extra yardage as a bonus.

Still obsessed with the majesty of my drive, we raced toward it where I proceeded to loft it high with my 7-iron. Then I hit another just short of the green. On the green, Corey spoke with the dryness of a bottle of red wine chased with several bong hits and stale Pringles: “We were going to say something about you committing a breach of etiquette by shooting before Dad and me who were behind you, but when we saw your second shot sail into the woods we decided to let it go…”

I apologized and learned a lesson there. When playing golf, take your time. The woods/water/sand will still be there when it’s finally your turn.

Yesterday I attended a charity “Girl Scout Golf Classic” and bid several times on 4 “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” musical tickets, something Kyle would have loved. Well, the Grinch did steal the tickets, I’ll tell you that. I placed my final bid just as “30 seconds left” was announced and then waited to see that the bid would be the winner. About 30 seconds after the end was called, a guy came over and tried to place a bid. I intervened and said, “the bidding’s closed.” He gave me a dirty look and walked toward the dining room of the William J. Devine Golf Course in Dorchester. As the sheets were being collected, I went to the dining room. Somehow, the cheater got back to the sheet and submitted his late, cheating bid. When his name was announced, he was hiding in the shadows…

What is wrong with people like this?

“Give me that! Don’t you know you’re not supposed to take things that don’t belong to you? What’s the matter with you, you some kind of wild animal?”

– Jim Carrey as The Grinch in
“How the Grinch Stole Christmas.” (2000)

Occasionally I’ll catch a whiff of a woman’s perfume that squeezes me through a time-space wormhole back to a time and a place and a woman. It hasn’t happened lately, either because my sense of smell is gone or I simply don’t get close enough for the sense to operate.
Whatever. That’s just a cheesy intro to my new car smell post. Yep. I sent an offer to three dealerships of what I wanted to pay for a new “Carbon Gray” 2008 Acura TSX w/ Navigation and within 12 hours, one accepted. Pete Boudreau, Internet Sales Manager at Acura of Auburn was simply great to deal with. Last night I signed up for some serious debt and this morning plugged in my iPod and drove away very happy.

Sadly, the old girl didn’t go without a fight. I don’t mean to go “Christine” on this, but some odd things happened with my Volvo once I made the decision to trade up. A “check engine” light caused a failed emissions test and $1,196.20 since May couldn’t turn it off. On Sunday it went out by itself and didn’t come back on… This morning as I put the car in reverse to exit my garage for the last time, it wouldn’t move. It felt like something was blocking the car behind me, so I got out and went back to check if I left something back there while emptying the trunk. Nothing. I got back in and backed out. (Queue X-Files music…)

First impressions…

• I really can’t drive 55 and spent a good deal of time in the left lane being careful about speeding.
• The iPod sounds amazing plugged directly into the Audio system…
• XM Radio (trial) is a great way to experience new music. A Lewis Black sketch on the Comedy station was cool.
• A navigation system is a cool new toy, but I always found my way without one. Still, if you’re in a strange place, you push “Go Home” and follow the breadcrumbs.

On the downside, I’ve been unable to successfully pair the “LeoTreo” with the female voiced Bluetooth system… On a certain level, that makes perfect sense.

I admit an embarrassingly high degree of ignorance of the Pearl Jam catalog, and I acknowledge they didn’t build their rabid fan base with stage gimmicks. A couple weeks ago I was trimming large swaths of weeds surrounding my house when “Release” randomly shuffled through my head. At a certain point in the song I simply stopped, um, released the mower, and stood there. Stunned. Intense doesn’t really cover it.

Speaking of covers, I’ve always considered this jam with Neil Young tearing up Young’s “Keep on Rockin in the Free World” one of the best “live” TV music performances I’d ever seen.

Fifteen years later, here’s another just as good… Wear earbuds if ya got ’em…

That Pearl jam is pretty, pretty, pretty good.

I parked my faithful 1996 Volvo facing away from the club full of eligible new hotties. I didn’t want it to have to see me straying with the younger, smoother models. The 2006 Acura TSX isn’t exactly a trophy, but it’s got a hot body and is very tempting. A chaperone accompanied me as I courted the youthful version of my faithful four wheeler. Ego plays a part in this equation. I’m sure I’ll look better with a partner ten years younger than my own, but I’ll pay a price. The looks. The snickers. I know what they’ll think… Bastards. They don’t get it. They’re not there when she talks to me and says, “turn left.” Clearly, she understands me. That’s all I really want. It’s not about the firm, supple leather seats…

Still, there was something not quite right. The new edition of my trade-in had been on the market since February. When I asked about that, the only answer I got was, “maybe it’s the color,” like race was something to do with it. Hmm… I wondered about stability. By accident, I found out an engagement was broken off back in June. A terse answer on that query was, “financing.” Was I dealing with a golddigger? I also noticed a little hesitation in the performance, which led me to wonder if that would worsen once I made a real commitment.

The ride home was understandably quiet. Cool air blew from the vents in a way I hadn’t felt in weeks since the A/C failed. Yeah, cold silence. I threw on some Sloan and they spoke to me. If I’m going to make this break, it’s not going to be easy. There will be payments and legal proceedings. I’ll have to “walk through the fire, and burn for it.”

Does anyone else find this headline/picture combo a little strange?

Why does buying a car have to suck so much? Sure, I enjoyed the test drives with Kyle, but that fun quickly turns to anesthesia-free gum surgery as soon as they start flapping dollars and nonsense. I should note here that car shopping on 90-something, high humidity days is not recommended, but in my case, it’s the reason for shopping.

Yesterday’s itinerary began with a stop at Sunnyside Acura in Nashua, NH. We were there to test drive my original target, a 2006 Acura TSX with Navigation. Plan B was immediately invoked as the Dealerships Controller had the car for the weekend. First we drove a 2006 TL, but it had an unbalanced tire vibration and left a shaky first impression. Next was a 2004 TSX and it was sweet. For a four cylinder, I couldn’t sense much less giddy-up than the 6-Cyl TL. We also spun a newly-designed 2009 TSX, but the new clown face grill design was as much a turnoff as the depreciation hit I’d take. Sunnyside also had an Infinity G35x and a BMW 3-something, but crappy gas mileage and questionable German reliability respectively had ruled them out at the keyboard.

Contrary to planetary norms, the further North we traveled, the hotter the wind blew. Cold bottles of Ira Lexus water greeted us in Manchester, and the black 2006 AWD IS250 we tested looked amazing as the heat rippled off the pavement. The IS250 is a hot car, and the Lexus badge just as appealing, but it’s about $5K more than the comparably equipped TSX, so the value equation favors Acura. Also, I think I’ll look a lot sillier driving 60 in the right lane in a hot Lexus than I will in a very warm TSX, and the Acura will slightly better gas mileage for my light footed efforts. Still, if some Lexus Sales Manager were to make me a Corleone-esque offer, I’d take it.

As Kyle and I discussed auto impressions over wheat linguine and marinara at the Manchester Olive Garden, I began wondering what I could get a new 2008 TSX for now that the 2009’s have washed ashore. Second shift research was about to begin…

To make this long story short, I researched Dealer invoice, holdbacks and incentives and discovered Acura is tossing dealers $1,500 to lose the 08’s. Armed with this information we drove to Herb Connolly Acura in Framingham, where their website listed 9 2008’s. When I arrived, they were down to 5, none in a color that excited me. The Sales dude said he could get a black/black (Hey, I just saw “The Dark Knight) ’08 from another dealer if we could agree on price. I gave him my low-ball offer and of course, he took it to his manager who came back with a price $1359 above my offer. I walked and took Kyle to a late lunch. I ran a few numbers and determined if we split the difference, I could get the car I wanted for about $4000 below MSRP.

When I returned, my rep was gone, so I dealt directly with the Sales Manager. He said the price was firm, and showed me some book indicating “invoice” was $2K higher than my research indicated, and added, “I don’t know what you did. Maybe you read it wrong.” Yeah, wrong. Mr. Anal checks and double checks. My numbers were right. Goodbye Herb Chambers Acura.

Stay tuned.

Saturday was a beautiful day for golf with my dad and brother Corey. I played pretty well and estimated by the last hole to have a 1-2 stroke lead on baby bro. To my surprise, the scorecard they were keeping had me down to both of them. It seems once they reach double par on a hole, they stop counting…

I can’t take another epic battle scene with guys with swords and iron masks on horses like the one in, “Chronicles of Narnia – Prince Caspian.” That’s enough for me.

On Friday, IndyMac Bank floated like a pale, bloated corpse and once again, you and I will purchase a corporate life preserver priced at between $4 billion and $8 billion.

It also looks like a plan cooked up by the enablers in the Bush administration includes billions more taxpayer financed checks for mortgage giants Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. Dubya and the boys apparently aren’t against corporate welfare.

CEOs “benefit substantially if the risks they take pay off,” but “pay no penalty” if their risks lead to losses or even catastrophe — another sign that capitalism, in its current form, isn’t living by its own rules. – Barney Frank (D) MA

Finally, yesterday the spoiler to my aging Swedish automobile came off in my hand while unpacking groceries instead of like a boomerang on the highway, allowing repair instead of a potentially ugly accident. One has to appreciate those little things…